A friend asked to read the book I wrote and gave me a five-word testimonial, I was a bit nervous when she told me it was a short one but the words she wrote where more powerful than a manuscript! She wrote ‘This book is my second bible’
WOW that really was amazing and leads me to share more in this blog today.
If you really want to make changes in your life the best way to go about it is to look holistically at all areas of your life only then can you see if there is any imbalance and it’s not all about diet and exercise!
I created this tool I guess for myself at first and then realised its SO POWERFUL I can share it.
I was overweight, I smoked, my marriage was unfulfilling, and my life seemed over loaded with stress and anxiety, I had three children ,ironically worked as a Nurse yet the magical things that were missing in my life where balance and contentment.
These areas MUST be addressed if you want a healthier happier life
Purpose
Communication
Fun
Mental health
Relationships
Spirituality
Physical health
Environment
Finances
Time management
If ANY of the above are imbalanced, then our lives are often unhappy so let’s address these in a simple way.
Look to make small changes in each area and I guarantee your health and contentment will improve. I have worked with many people over the past 17 years and everyone has experienced improvement, it’s a ‘done deal’ as they say.
In a nutshell, when you improve each area on the list you will automatically start to feel better.
Having more fun, living an authentic life ( just being yourself) ,loving and caring for your body ( what you put into it and how you rest and respect it).
Getting into nature more, moving your body, getting a closer relationship to your spiritual side.
Improving the relationships you have with family, friends and loved one.
Having good boundaries with others, learning to ‘say what you mean without being mean’
Living within your means financially, working on finding ways to improve your mental health by communicating your feelings and finding strategies to reduce negativity.
Finding a purpose in your life, making time for yourself and others.
Often people feel OVERWHELMED when they look at the above list and end up procrastinating, but the truth is if you break them down and chose one small area to work on you will start the wonderful journey of self-improvement.
I can honestly say I have never been so happy and content with who I am and it all started with one SMALL tiny action.
Have you ever met anyone who is enthused with passion and full of excitement? Their energy seems almost palpable and their whole persona seems to light up.
This dear friend I spoke to today is in the states and is a leading person in sustainability, her name is Kate McGuire of Converted Closet.
She is a cloths designer who converts cloths to help the planet become more sustainable.
Interestingly enough I am as passionate about Health as Kate is about Sustainability so the question was posed, what can we do to get ourselves in this state about our own passions?
I was surprised with her response, but it soon made sense to me and it’s SO simple! Stay with me on this one please but the answer is in the children.
She suggests we empower our children by asking them simply what we can do, I have four grandchildren and 2 of those are 3 years old.
They LOVE being asked questions and seem to give quite astonishing, authentic, simple answers to life challenges and passions.
Kate suggests you ask the children what they think in relation to your passions and challenges and how to get more excited about life.
As you know in my case it’s helping the world become healthier and in Kates's, it’s how to help the planet with sustainability.
Of course, 3 may seem to be a little young but any age child will have something wonderfully simple to offer as a suggestion.
Whether is your grandchildren children’s nieces or nephews, it’s the children who seem to keep things less complicated and have a ‘breath of fresh air approach’.
I asked my grandchild one day about making the world a happier place and she said you Nonna be happy as that makes everyone happier, how simple is that to start with? It filled me full of passion immediately.
This is a random and out-of-my-comfort-zone Blog but I LOVE to change things up a bit.
Now off you go and find a young person and ask them in a light way about something you would like to get excited and passionate about (that’s appropriate to discuss) and see what wonderful nugget you might receive.
I believe we have a sense of duty to make the world a better place for the future of our children, so let’s ensure we include them in our journeys.
Uncertainty is not knowing what will happen next ‘will I get a certain task complete in time for the deadline?’ ‘do I have enough hours to get my to-do list finished’, what will the economic future look like‘ will I have enough money to pay the bills ‘what will happen if my health deteriorates ’ how can I manage my work life balance’ the list goes on infinitum!
The research suggests the bottom line is we are not comfortable with uncertainty and our reactions to uncertainty may have made sense in evolution. The brain is constantly trying to predict what will happen next, allowing it to prepare the body and mind in the most effective way possible. In uncertain situations, that planning is a lot harder and if you’re potentially facing a predator or a human foe, the wrong response could be deadly. As a result, it could pay to err on the side of caution – either by avoiding the uncertainty altogether or by putting the brain and body in an aroused state that is ready to respond to a changing situation.
This above is most interesting! So what the hell can we do about the heightened state of anxiety and fear we have that’s often brought on by uncertainty? Believe it or not, we need to EMBRACE IT!
YES, it’s actually a gift to learn to go with the flow and know nothing is truly certain, life is uncertain, and if we can learn to sit with that discomfort and be at peace with it the anxiety and fear will dissipate.
Firstly I often share the three A’s Acknowledge, Acceptance, and Action.
MAKE time to acknowledge how you are feeling, it is imperative we feel the feelings and own them.
Then comes the acceptance of how we feel, we may not like it but it is our truth at that moment.
Finally the important part, is the action! What can we do about it? What choices have we got? ‘NHS Inform’ is a site that has some great solutions, but here are some of my tried and tested ones.
Talk about things with others and get another perspective.
Gather as much information as you can to ensure you can make an informed choice of what you can do.
Be curious and practice gratitude for the situation, there will ALWAYS be some great learning to be had!
BREATHE, practice slowing down you breath and being present.
Enjoy and Live life regardless of the uncertainty, as they had to do in the war years
Find what works for you and remember the saying ‘This too will pass’.
Often we find we can actually use the uncertainty fear and anxiety for good use, as we may be able to be more focused and productive. I was able to write this blog as a result of the uncertainty which led to fear and anxiety, so it’s been of help in some way to me, and hopefully to you too.
Finally, I would add, be kind to yourself and compassionate and remember, you are really doing the best you can and it is a natural state to be uncertain.
Understanding more about the challenges we have given us all greater insight into how we can help ourselves feel more in control of the uncertainty, and live in a happy more peaceful way.
How wonderful and enlightening that this years trends is really taking us back to who we really are
This is SO scary I am also really excited to be sharing some great new learning ( hopefully) watch this space and next months Vlog to see how it went.
This is MASSIVE for me and I believe a lot of other people in business that are self-employed and on the same boat.
We seem constantly busy, attracting new clients, networking, posting social media, not taking proper breaks, working too many hours, putting ourselves under great pressure to ensure we are successful and too fearful to relax and enjoy ourselves?
It’s like we are driven onwards to the next thing and the next thing, not being satisfied with what we really have now.
A client I recently worked with said, i’t never seems enough’.
How on earth can we really let go and trust we have done enough and its ok to take some down time?
I am doing something I have NEVER really done and that’s not posting for the next few weeks, no work social media or vlogs or blogs, wow it feels a bit scary but I have to ‘practice what I teach’ as my daughter in law shared with me ( preaching no one needs)
In a few weeks I will do a Vlog and explain why I have done this and how it might benefit us all if we ensure we have regular down time.
Our brains kick in when we try to let go of control and give us negative feedback, the negative self-talk comes rushing.
We won’t get new clients, we must carry on in case we get forgotten, how can we relax when we won’t get enough income etc etc.
My suggestion is to allow the feelings but remember if you are running on half empty your health will eventually suffer and ensure we take the advice we would give to others and that would be to take time out.
So my experiment begins today!
NO vlogs or blogs or work social media for the next 2 or 3 weeks On my return I will reveal the results!
See you on the other side!!
Do you suffer from anxiety? it really is a state that can make us ill if its prolonged. Check this weeks Vlog out and see if it can help you manage and work with your anxiety in a healthier more productive way.
So here we are in that interim period, not yet the ending of last year and not yet the beginning of a new one.
Perhaps it’s a time for reflection? what did we learn from last year? What would we like to bring into the new one? what do we need to change and how can we do that?
Many of us wake up each day and repeat the same behaviours but if we really want to improve our mental, physical and emotional health, we need to take stock of how we are doing.
Every new years eve I take time with my husband reflecting back on last year, its ups its downs and the learning.
We write down our aspirations hopes and dreams for next year and spend time discussing how we can make the changes to improve our health and wellbeing.
The bottom line is we all want to live in a healthy body free from disease for as long as possible and if the research is correct ( 90 percent of longevity is life style) we are personally responsible for making those changes for improved wellbeing.
Benefits
Self-reflection is key the to self-awareness; it allows you to look at neutrality at your thoughts, feelings, emotions and actions.
So as I end this last post for 2022 I wish you a blessed and healthy 2023 and remember Self-reflection will lead you to growth, positivity and happiness .